Old fogey alert!

Sorry – pointless post really – I just want to get it out somewhere.
I was preaching today at the chapel just down the road (ie the one we ought to go to, really, if we followed the support your local church rule rather than sticking to the one we were already at when we moved because we feel comfortable there) and was confirmed in the rightness of our decision.
We live on the edge of a fairly deprived estate, with lots of council/social housing and lots of young families nearby. The church decided a while ago that it was time to reach out to some of these families, which is great. The traditional morning service has been replaced by breakfast at 10, then Sunday school from 10:30 -11, with three age groups: children, teens and adults, then a time of “altogether worship” after which the children go back out to Sunday school and the adults stay in for the rest of the service. The preacher is now invited to take over the service after the worship time, ie to do readings, sermon and intercessions but nothing else. I find this difficult for a start, as I prefer to plan my services so that everything adds together iyswim and if I don’t know what will be in the worship bit then I can’t use that to feed into the sermon etc. I also miss having a children’s address to do, as I feel that can often be really helpful for the adults too, and a good way to set up the theme.
Anyway, the scheme has worked really well at doing what they set out to do. They have gone from having a handful of children at about half the services to consistently having 15 or 20 children and a good sprinkling of teenagers, the worship time is led by the young people’s band, modern songs are presented in a lively way, with lots of use of powerpoint, the children are enthusiastic and the average age of the congregation has dropped considerably. All very encouraging.
But… looking around the church my heart bled. I was quite shocked to see how many familiar faces were missing and how out of place the few older members of the congregation who still come seemed to feel. The music was loud – too loud to sing to much of the time; there was no lead singer to follow and many of the songs were unfamiliar. The prayers sounded good, but had little content. A few people hid at the back until the end of the altogether worship time then just snuck in as late as they dared for the end bit; others stood, looking acutely uncomfortable, through the songs. It was really sad – and tbh I was right there with them. When I turned over the page of the song sheet and saw that we were to sing “Be thou my vision”, one of my favourite hymns, I was so pleased to see one I knew – then almost burst into tears as we sang it because it was butchered and rendered almost unsingable by inappropriate use of rhythms and accompaniment.
Maybe I’m just an old fogey, maybe it’s because of people like me that the church is losing contact with society, maybe I’m looking for a compromise which doesn’t exist, but while I can see all the good the changes they have made are doing it also makes me terribly sad that people are being alienated by them. If only the type of service we had today could have been put in as well as the traditional one, rather than replacing it, then those who have been coming for years might have felt comfortable to continue coming. The argument is that they can come to the evening service, which remains unchanged in format, but at this time of year many of them can’t. It’s too dark for them to come out in the evenings and too far for them to go elsewhere in the mornings and they are left feeling pushed out of their own community 🙁
No idea what the answer could be, or even if there is one, but just wanted to get my confused feelings down somehow.
At the moment it feels as though everybody is only seeing the good (which I know is considerable) and ignoring the downsides, because the people affected have just quietly faded away…